The Year that Was

It is a new year (2009) for all of us, and another milestone (40th year) for me as I just celebrated my birthday two days ago.

2008 was a happy, but stressful year. With my husband, Joey by my side, almost every single day is a happy day for me, really!

In May, we had Norman, Joey's oldest brother, and his family over. This meant eating and shopping. This also called for a trip up north to the Grand Canyon where there was still some leftover snow.

Joey participated in his second full marathon, and this was the Rock 'n Roll marathon in San Diego in June (yes, summer time). He had a lot of fun running, the nerd; while I had a lot of fun shopping.

I had gallbladder surgery in October, which was sort of a happy event -- Joey swears that I held up a finger (not the middle one), and uttered, "Party on!" as I was being wheeled into surgery. Clearly, the anaesthesia had quickly taken effect. Now, is that happiness or what?! Hehehe.

For Joey's 40th birthday in November, I gifted him with a yellow Labrador Retriever puppy. It was pure joy, and I sometimes couldn't believe that we actually owned a dog again.

Ahhh, happiness.

As for sadness and stress, some people I am close to experienced deaths in their families, and that is enough to make me shed tears for their loss. When they hurt, I hurt, too. My brother-in-law lost his mother after a very long battle with cancer. A sister-in-law (Joey's sister-in-law) lost her father after a quick illness. Cielo Kaw, my veterinarian in Manila who I am close to, lost her young husband after a year's battle with cancer. Sigh.

That was the sadness part.

What stressed me out the most in 2008? Having a drug addict for a friend. I tried so hard to be supportive of this friend who turned out to be a drug addict (seven years and running ...). I encouraged DA-friend to lean on me for strength and straightening up. I drove DA-friend to the hospital to seek help. I attended an "Addicts Anonymous" meeting with DA-friend, which was something I only saw in movies where people say "I am Marife (name), and I'm an addict." (it actually happens in real life! Yes, I am so ignorant and naive, even at my age). I would cheer on DA-friend for every clean month. Turns out, it was only one month of cleanliness, and not the four months I celebrated with DA-friend. It's hard to be made a fool of.

I was very stressed by DA-friend's addiction, as there were unpredictable personality changes that made situations and the environment more volatile. Throughout the seven years of addiction, DA-friend was evicted from rented homes, and fired from jobs. I'm sure friendships were also broken/lost, along the way. Sadly, while DA-friend knows better, it is much more convenient to blame everyone else for one's own weaknesses and misery, and use these as an excuse to "use" again. I can only do so much. And I can only be lied to, so much. I am still a supportive friend, but it gets tiring. You know what I mean.

And so, with the new year, we can expect more laughter and tears, more happiness and sadness. Out with the bad, in with the good. May my 40th year be very interesting!